Humor

[kwh]

Good one.

[OldLincoln]

[ltxi]

Oh, yeah....that's good!

[GROTMAN]

Here's another one..

[CJB]

I just spit up a little in my mouth.....

[Bawanna]

I just experienced my first case of projectile vomiting! Seen it before, never thought it could happen to me.

[Bobshouse]

Here's another one..

Sorry, move on, no Quaaludes for you.

[jocko]

I just spit up a little in my mouth.....

I kinda like that picture, just sayin. I heard he and catlyn are seeing each utter. Might be rumor. Just sayin

u know, just because 50 women said he did this doesnt mean he did. I need more evidence

[Bawanna]

I love the outfit myself. Wish I'd gotten a few Confederate flags before the PC police shut everything down.

Has to be millions of them out there. I'll find one.

[jocko]

Begin forwarded message:

From: Rick Heim <rick@trailercityinc.com>
Date: August 13, 2015 at 7:48:34 AM EDT
To: Jamie Albert <james.macd.albert@gmail.com>, Ann <ann@trailercityinc.com>, keith wade <caddisflyjkw@aol.com>, roger beckner <rkbeckner@yahoo.com>, dennis christian <christd1945@gmail.com>, David Laughlin <cdavidlaughlin@yahoo.com>, sharon murphy <nanamurphyskpm@gmail.com>, mike murphy <mmurphy003@gmail.com>, mark pallotta <mark@bondins.com>, ken farris <kfarris23@tampabay.rr.com>, john sprouse <superglide05@cox.net>, hris wade <ckwade84@gmail.com>, allison <ahntci@aol.com>, Mike Johnson <MJDJ1718@FRONTIER.COM>, Kyle Hamilton <rkhamilton1950@gmail.com>, Hunter <tomatofish13@aol.com>, Greg Grindo <ggrindo@aol.com>, Andrew Albert <Andrew.Albert@wvfcu.org>, John Heim <johnheim@bellsouth.net>
Subject: Fwd: PISSING OFF EVERYONE



Sent from my iPhone

Begin forwarded PISSING OFF EVERYONE








pissing Off Everyone

I'd just come out of the shop with a roast beef sandwich, large chips, ear of corn & a jumbo sausage.
A poor homeless man sat there and said 'I've not eaten for two days.' I told him, 'I wish I had your will power.'

A fat girl served me in McDonald's at lunchtime. She said 'sorry about the wait'.
I said, 'Don't worry, you'll find a way to lose it eventually'.

I walked past a black kid sitting at a bus stop as I went into the bank.
When I came out, he looked at me and said 'Any Change? 'I said, 'Nope, you're still black'.

Snow in the forecast and the TV weather gal said she was expecting 8 inches tonight.
I thought to myself, 'fat chance', with a face like that!

Years ago it was suggested that an apple a day kept the doctor away.
But since all the doctors are now Muslim, I've found that a bacon sandwich works best!

Japanese scientists have now created a camera with such a fantastic shutter speed
that it is now possible to take a photograph of a woman with her mouth closed.

I hate all this terrorist business. I used to love the days when you could look at an unattended bag on a train or bus
and think to yourself. I'm going to take that.'

Man in a hot air balloon is lost over Iowa . He looks down and sees a farmer in the fields and shouts to him,
where am I? The farmer looks back up and shouts back. You're in a basket you dumb ****!

I had a big lead in a trivia competition at a local bar until the last question which I got wrong.
The question was where do women have the curliest hair? Fiji was the correct answer....hell, how did I know they wanted the name of a country?

I took my Biology exam last Friday. I was asked to name two things commonly found in cells.
A pparently "Blacks" and "Mexicans" were NOT the correct answers.I ty

[GLOCKROCKER]

[wyntrout]

Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, 'Esther, I'd really like to ride in that helicopter.'
Esther always replied, 'I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars'
One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, 'Esther, I'm 85 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance.'
To this, Esther replied, 'Morris that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.'
The pilot overheard the couple and said, 'Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and don't say a word I won't charge you a penny! But if you say one word it's fifty dollars.'
Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy manoeuvres, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, but still not a word.
When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, 'By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!'
Morris replied, 'Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Esther fell out, but you know, fifty dollars is fifty dollars!'